Closer to Dog

by Cousin Brian

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1.
03:23
2.
3.
03:25
4.
03:17
5.
04:08
6.
02:47
7.
8.
04:31
9.
03:17

about

All tracks recorded and produced to 1/4" tape, mixed, mastered by Cousin Brian

credits

released July 6, 2015

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all rights reserved

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about

Cousin Brian Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Philadelphia
sean, elliot, shane, jake


buy our first LP - www.slugsaltrex.com

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Track Name: Emoting
Emoting

When I think it dawns on me
what i know is all i keep
several years of silence gleam
next to bricks of worthless speech

and I intend to wait again
for the spark inside of me
that signals me to feel again
feel the silent part of me and I wait

I long to know myself
emoting
they wrote of me

thirsty years of lacking strength
barely there for me to see
confidence in time alone
reassured by older me

and I intend to wait alone
for the spark inside of me
that signals me to feel again
feel the silent part of me and I wait

I long to know myself
emoting
they wrote of me

here is but a memory
not for me to understand
time could wrap me up likewise
find the sum of me here... alive
Track Name: Breaking the Stone
Breaking the Stone

As he grows
the boundaries of his knowledge shape his views
and choose their prey
time slides by
but nothing he can grab onto will keep him anchored down

I need to release myself and make a me with new eyes that see the waste
why he paints his life this way, he may never find out
for it's too late

I release myself from this cold now bound for me
and I try breaking the stone
while I teach myself about which path's best for me
still i try breaking the stone

babies eyes, a heart of hopes and dreams
i know I'll die if unfulfilled
desperate cries, announcing all my secrets
to the souls who came inside

I dream of packaging myself
and offering to the world what's left in me
please, I need my life this way
don't attempt to engage me in some change

I release myself from this cold now bound for me
and I try breaking the stone
while I teach myself about which path's best for me
still i try breaking the stone

please, I need my life this way
Track Name: Darkwater
There is a spot unfilled
there is a half seasoned mind that won't forget
there is a blink of hope
there is a sense of compunction that calls me home

I feel the same old lines that I drew before
and that I can't concentrate now, for fear I'll die
Is there an ignorant head so I can cope with mine?
although the lives of me would still be gone

Part of me finds some comfort in believing that
finally I'll reach the land
Don't fall down tonight
and keep your thoughts with me
I'm betting on pain tonight
and so I ought to bleed

We have the curse of life
an animated freedom to change its course
it hurts to wonder why
and we don't need to make do
or feel obliged

I sing the same old words that I sang before
because the things that upend me
will never die
I hate to think about failure so soon in my life
but it's not wise to believe I'll be alright
Track Name: People
I know the feeling of time
it's independent of minds
i got stuck in the world
And we don't mean a thing
we're such a minuscule thing
we got stuck in the world
I understand the nature of why we all feel bad
we got stuck in the world
we weren't made to be contained
that result seems great

and this i know
that there's no god who claims the physical world
and if you think that there's a plan for us
you really haven't learned too much of anything
i have to laugh
i have to scream
I have to learn a couple things about love
I must believe
only what appears true as
opposed to thinking anything

let's all poke around here
deeper into parts we can't go
let's all poke around here
deeper into parts we don't know
and so you hold weakness in your hand
I let go


the only merit is truth
it's only honored by proof
so complex is the world
there's plenty there to see
i use to fascinate me
since i'm stuck in the world
I find it hard to smile at people who don't understand
that they're just part of the world
we're products of the facts of time
not results He made

and things are hard
I realize that there's no heaven or hell
of course some people can't just live their lives
and go out proud that someone's better off
now that you're dead
your thoughts are gone
and everything you ever knew is now lost
cells start to die
organisms come to
feed and live and die some other day

let's all poke around here
deeper into parts we can't go
let's all poke around here
deeper into parts we don't know
and so you hold weakness in your hand
I let go


try me I know what I see
try me I know what I see
(try me I know.. I see)
try me I know what I see
(try me I know.. I see)
try me I know what I see
I know what I see
it lives inside me
I know what I see
it lives inside me
Track Name: Moon
As they're leaning towards
mastering their eyes,
opening their ears into our lives
...that's a bit wrong
you seem afraid of our right

When the doomsday calls
will we part our lives?
will we break down hard
and last one night?
would you dare to breed child?
I can't imagine their time
I even recommend dying to you

I should stay one, too
I should take all that's left behind
I should stay one, too
I could be all I want and die

Now we've seen our end
had a taste of hell
gave the kiss of death
to kiss and tell
you don't know what we are
go and learn the trade of cheap lies

we should leave our home
we should face your dark
we must throw down lives
to make our mark
-a mark of life and not waste
no, I used to carry this face
I'll miss the intimate race to you

I should stay one, too
I should take all that's left behind
I should stay one, too
I could be all I want and die
we die

living for what cause, do we remember?
Track Name: Green
this type of thought will stalk you home.
can't help but wonder… god forbid you know.
some breed of thoughtless malts we are.
compared with nothing… still not much at all.

anything at all I meet with doubt
will be a treat in time, like a surprise.
so you think god just reads your thoughts?
well he leaves me to mine, my doubting mind.

these neatly crafted lives we find...
though mine holds nothing, something needs to go.
how can god be, when I'm so bored?
our purpose construct, not external law.

anything at all I meet with doubt
will be a treat in time, like a surprise.
so you think god just reads your thoughts?
well he leaves me to mine, my doubting mind.
Track Name: Understimulated
spoke in tongues
less has made sense since I wheeled around
woken up
makeshift metaphors for feeling doubt
only one
dead receptor's long lost lonely touch
fully run
spoon-fed drip feed
reset courtesy crutch

My shameful chunks all over the place
Persistent past that bites hard
hide, risk a loss of prominence
I second guess myself

useless hack
hurts to be it hurts to feel alone
purpose lacked
stacks of thoughts, plans, promises, and goals
swollen eyes
cruel illusions, infiltrating spite
sullen sighs
exhale truth, watch reason leaving sight

My shameful chunks all over the place
Persistent past that bites hard
hide, risk a loss of prominence
I second guess myself
Track Name: Pushed Away
Feel, feel for me because I can't
Control, control yourself because I can't
for reasons unbeknownst to me
a penetrating nightmare shakes my heart
and I'm cold
Thoughts lay frozen under, not getting old

Ghosts hold me down and slip me my fate
I'm pushing through but fail to relate
Hope flashes by but never will stay
Whispers ignored as I'm pushed away

Rain, rain is rushing to the ground now
as if something would reward it there.
But me, I just wait for it to end.
I don't rush to anything.
I'm well aware there's no reward for me.
When cherished things and simple tricks
that used to occupy me have died out,
then I'm sold.
Dreams lay frozen under, I'll never know

The sum of these lives
Brings no relief to me
The will of my smile has gone
depleting me
I'm here in the dark
I reach to touch a hand
But mine passes through
Track Name: A Time
Skip quick to now,
the world is burning. I am at ease.
the sudden spike in action
brought me what I pleased
And pricks of pain serve to remind me I'm awake
And all to gain has now been spotted in my fate

Your life's come un-synced with mine
we're just dancing out of time
turn this way and you will find,
we're just dancing out of time
Nerves tangled with in his mind
we're just dancing out of time
False perception bending signs
we're just dancing out of time

Sighs play a decent role
it's just a driving force that you might find
eyes sway and seem to roll
it's just a driving force that you might find

I think just the same
the sun is setting
a redness bleeds
but not with love or honor;
torn by a machine

and all the strength and valor's
left to be washed clean
and all the lesser patrons seek
someone to lead

Your life's come un-synced with mine
we're just dancing out of time
turn this way and you will find,
we're just dancing out of time
Nerves tangled with in his mind
we're just dancing out of time
False perception bending signs
we're just dancing out of time

Sighs play a decent role
it's just a driving force that you might find
eyes sway and seem to roll
it's just a driving force that you might find

New lord under an old star
new lord under an old star
New world and still an old scar
new lord and still an old war
no life for you